Merry Christmas, Joyeux Noel, Feliz Navidad, Buon Natale, Selamat Natal and all that.

The following video is just a bit of fun. Not to be taken seriously.

Numerwang: the gameshow that simple everyone's talking about!

Pontificator resurrexit

On St. Augustine's mistake

A cock and bull story from the 16th century

THE SECOND BOOK OF THE COURTIER
" You all are familiar with those splendid lies so well composed that they move to laughter. A very excellent one was
but lately told me by a friend of ours who never suffers us to be
without them."
Then the Magnifico Giuliano said: "
Be that as it may, it cannot be more excellent or more ingenious
than one which a fellow-Tuscan of ours, a merchant of
Lucca, affirmed the other day as a positive fact." "
Tell it to us," added my lady Duchess.
The Magnifico Giuliano replied, laughing: "
This merchant, so he tells the story, once finding himself in
Poland, decided to buy a quantity of sables with the intention of
carrying them into Italy and making great profit thereby. And
after much effort, being unable to enter Muscovy himself (by
reason of the war that was then waging between the King of
Poland and the Duke of Muscovy), he arranged with the help of
some people of the country, that on an appointed day certain
Muscovite merchants should come with their sables to the frontier
of Poland, and he promised to be there in order to strike the
bargain. Accordingly, proceeding with his companions towards
Muscovy, the man of Lucca reached the Dnieper, which he
found all frozen as hard as marble, and saw that the Muscovites (
who on account of the war were themselves suspicious of the
Poles) were already on the other bank, but approached no
nearer than the width of the river. So, having recognized each
other, the Muscovites after some signalling began to speak with
a loud voice, and to ask the price that they wished for their
sables; but such was the extreme cold that they were not heard,
for before reaching the other bank (where the man of Lucca
and his interpreters were) the words froze in the air, and remained
there frozen and caught in such manner that the Poles,
who knew the custom, set about making a great fire in the very
middle of the river; because to their thinking that was the limit
reached by the warm voice before it was stopped by freezing,
and the river was quite solid enough to bear the fire easily. So, I
when this was done, the words (which had remained frozen for '
the space of an hour) in due course began to melt and to fall in
a murmur, like snow from the mountains in May; and thus they
were at once heard very well, although the men had already
gone. But as the merchant thought that the words asked too
high a price for the sables, he would not accept the offer and so
returned without them."110
56.—Thereupon everyone laughed


Castiglione's original:


Libro Secondo

Quelle belle bugie mo, cosi ben assettate,
come movano a ridere, tutti lo sapete. E quell'amico nostro,
che non ce ne lassa mancare, a questi dì me ne raccontò
una molto eccellente. —

LV. Disse allora il Magnifico JULIANO: Sia come si vuole,
né più eccellente né più sottile non può ella esser di
quella che l'altro giorno per cosa certissima affermava un
nostro Toscano, mercatante lucchese.—Ditela, — soggiunse
la signora DUCHESSA. Rispose il Magnifico JULIANO, ridendo :
Questo mercatante, siccome egli dice, ritrovandosi una volta
in Polonia, deliberò di comperare una quantità di zibellini,
con opinion di portargli in Italia e farne un gran guadagno;
e dopo molte pratiche, non potendo egli stesso in persona
andar in Moscovia, per la guerra che era tra 'l re di Polonia
e 'l duca di Moscovia, per mezzo d'alcuni del paese ordinò
che un giorno determinato certi mercatanti moscoviti
coi lor zibellini venissero ai confini di Polonia, e promise
esso ancor di trovarvisi, per praticar la cosa. Andando
adunque il Lucchese coi suoi compagni verso Moscovia,
giunse al Boristene, il qual trovò tutto duro di ghiaccio come
un marmo, e vide che i Moscoviti, li quali per lo sospetto
della guerra dubitavano essi ancor de'Poloni, erano
già su l'altra riva, ma non s'accostavano, se non quanto era

largo il fiume. Cosi conosciutisi l'un l'altro, dopo alcuni cenni,
li Moscoviti cominciarono a parlar allo, e domandar il
prezzo che volevano dei loro zibellini, ma tanto era estremo
il freddo, che non erano intesi ; perché le parole, prima che
giungessero all' altra riva, dove era questo Lucchese e i suoi interpreti, si gielavano in aria, e vi restavano ghiacciate e prese di modo, che quei Poloni che sapeano il costume, presero per partito di far un gran foco proprio al mezzo del fiume, perché, al lor parere, quello era il termine dove giungeva la voce ancor calda prima che ella fosse dal ghiaccio intercetta; ed ancora il fiume era tanto sodo, che ben poteva sostenere il foco. Onde, fatto questo, le parole, che per spazio d'un'ora erano state ghiacciate, cominciarono a liquefar
si e discender giù mormorando, come la neve dai monti il maggio ; e cosi subito furono intese benissimo, benché già gli uomini di là fossero partiti : ma perché a lui parve che quelle parole dimandassero troppo gran prezzo per i zibellini, non volle accettare il mercato, e cosi se ne ritornò senza. — * LVI. Risero allora tutti.

Qualche parola da meditare oggi

Sebbene s'ha detto "se non è vero è ben trovato" anzi non tutto quello vero è sexy.. . .

Ed altrimenti non tutto quello sexy è vero affatto.

-Gianni Venanzio


Even though it's said: "if it isn't true it's well invented" not everything that's true is sexy.

Furthermore not everything sexy is true either.

Is there a God? Or rather how this question would be dealt with on an annoying Cross-Fire arguing people show

Also another hilarious episode, this time on the question of AIDS in Africa:

Giambattista Marino (1569-1625) an Italian contemporary of Góngora

L’Adone

Canto Sesto

Il Giardino del piacere

14

Son cinque corpi il cielo e gli elementi

E pur de’ sensi il numero è sì fatto;

L’orbe stellato di bei lumi ardenti

È dela vista un natural ritratto

Son poi tra lor conformi e rispondenti

L’udito al’aere ed ala terra il tatto

Né par che meno in simpatia risponda

L’odorato ala fiamma, il gusto al’onda



Adonis

Canto the Sixth

The Garden of Delights

14

There are five bodies in the heavens and the elements

And the senses are of this same number.

The globe with beautiful burning lights

Is a natural portrait of the sense of sight.

Amongst themselves they are equal and corresponding

The sense of hearing to the air and touch to the earth

Nor does it appear that

Smell to flames and taste to waves

correspond with any less sympathy.



Adonis

Canto Sexto

El jardín de las delicias

14

Hay cinco cuerpos en el cielo y los elementos

Y asimismo los sentidos son de este mismo número

El orbe estrellado por hermosas luces ardientes

Es un retrato natural de la vista

Entonces son entre sí conformes y correspondientes

El oído al aire y el tacto a la tierra

Ni parece que con menos simpatía corresponda

El olfato a la llama y el gusto a las olas.

America also known as 'merica

Cecco Angiolieri- Dante's colorful friend

S'i fosse fuoco, arderei 'l mondo;
s'i fosse vento, lo tempestarei;
s'i fosse acqua, i' l'annegherei;
s'i fosse Dio, mandereil' en profondo;
s'i fosse papa, allor serei giocondo,
ché tutti cristiani imbrigarei;
s'i fosse 'mperator, ben lo farei;
a tutti tagliarei lo capo a tondo.
S'i fosse morte, andarei a mi' padre;
s'i fosse vita, non starei con lui;
similemente faria da mi' madre.
Si fosse Cecco com'i' sono e fui,
torrei le donne giovani e leggiadre:
le zoppe e vecchie lasserei altrui.


If I were fire I’d burn the world

If I were wind I’d storm it

If I were water I’d drown it

If I were God I’d sent it to Hell

If I were the Pope I’d be happy

‘cause I would interfere in the life of every Christian.

If I were Emperor I know what I’d do

I’d order everyone’s had cut off like that!

If I were Death I’d visit my father

If I were Life I’d run away from him.

The same thing goes for my mother.


If I were Cecco which I was and am

I’d have young and sprightly women

And the lame and ugly ones I’d leave for another.

The diabolical non-parody Weird Al song meme

Here is a meme of my own design. The top ten original (non-parody) Weird Al songs. Meaning there are not direct parodies but have original music and lyrics. Although this doesn't mean the songs are not an indirect parody of an entire musical genre and or song category.

Here they are in reverse order Letterman Style:

10. Albuquerque

9. Good Old Days

8. UHF Theme

7. Good Enough For Now

6. Buy Me A Condo

5. When I Was Your Age

4. Melanie

3. Velvet Elvis

2. You Don't Love Me Anymore

1. One More Minute


Memed: Advise and Dissent, Torgo Devil

Immanuel Kant Attack Ad

Congress- Our tax dollars at work

Rep. Gary Nelson (R-CT) Introduces The Gary Nelson Personal Pay Raise Bill

The Media

Mean Automakers Dash Nation's Hope For Flying Cars